I nearly got run over today. I was on my way back on my scooter after buying a packet of chips when three men on another incoming scooter tried to grope me by extending their hands while they approached me. They weren't successful with the act of sexually harassing me in broad daylight, and so they rammed into my scooter, causing me to lose control and fall down. There were two other people who were witness to the act but all they did was stand by and watch me struggle with the weight of lifting the scooter off my right foot.
There are plenty of things I could write about after what just happened. Sexual harassment, lending a helping hand or altruistic behavior are topics that people have written about plenty of times. But quite frankly, one thing stands out the most.
The act of bullying.
We've all been bullied at one point of time. We've all bullied someone at one point of time. And obviously, being at the receiving end sucks donkey balls.
Psychologists describe the act of bullying as a "distinctive pattern of aggressive behavior manifested by an individual by deliberately harming and humiliating others." It's a patterned way of behavior and is very durable, mainly because bullies eventually get what they want. They don't exist without victims. The act includes verbal harassment, threats, physical assault and coercion. And their victims constantly fall prey to this aggressive behavior.
People say that bullies were once victims too, and this is their way of protecting themselves. I don't blame them. With the right kind of help, they pull themselves together and realize their stupid mistakes.
What if a person is just a bully by nature? What if they were never victims?
I was in the 11th and 12th grade when I was bullied. This classmate of mine took it upon her holy duty to spread rumors about me and verbally abuse me in front of our other classmates. We were schoolmates at one point of time and I never got around to understanding as to what it was I even did to her to get her harsh attention, because as far as I can remember, I never interacted with her except when it was absolutely necessary.
Okay it's high school. EVERY one goes through that, you say.
How about in your 3rd year degree in University? By someone who was once your close friend? This time it wasn't me, who was the victim, rather, a close friend of mine. She took control of her life by first getting rid of people who she thought were negative influence on her. I am SO proud of her for her honest and brave move.
Not proud of the stupidity that followed. Backhanded comments, bitchy looks, the works. No, it wasn't her doing this. It was the friend she pulled away from.
There are bullies everywhere. Your neighbors, teachers, colleagues, friends, family members.
"How does this connect with the first topic?" you ask. Men in general are bullies. I think it's the excess testosterone they pump out, which automatically makes them masters of the universe. And in a culture struck country like India, men view women as objects. They must have us under their thumb. Yes, that gives them the right to eve tease and grope us in public as well. Deny this, they will get aggressive and take what they want. No, I'm not trying to shove down some feminine crap down your throats. I'll leave that to my bra-burning sisters.
I wish I could go all Road Rash on them rather than get bullied off the road.
Hey man, I get the fact that you all are sexually depraved and shit. We all need some lovin' from time to time and yeah we get a little touchy-feely. But ew, yeah?
So the question is: Do you complain about the bullying or do you give the bully something to complain about?
There are plenty of things I could write about after what just happened. Sexual harassment, lending a helping hand or altruistic behavior are topics that people have written about plenty of times. But quite frankly, one thing stands out the most.
The act of bullying.
We've all been bullied at one point of time. We've all bullied someone at one point of time. And obviously, being at the receiving end sucks donkey balls.
Psychologists describe the act of bullying as a "distinctive pattern of aggressive behavior manifested by an individual by deliberately harming and humiliating others." It's a patterned way of behavior and is very durable, mainly because bullies eventually get what they want. They don't exist without victims. The act includes verbal harassment, threats, physical assault and coercion. And their victims constantly fall prey to this aggressive behavior.
People say that bullies were once victims too, and this is their way of protecting themselves. I don't blame them. With the right kind of help, they pull themselves together and realize their stupid mistakes.
What if a person is just a bully by nature? What if they were never victims?
I was in the 11th and 12th grade when I was bullied. This classmate of mine took it upon her holy duty to spread rumors about me and verbally abuse me in front of our other classmates. We were schoolmates at one point of time and I never got around to understanding as to what it was I even did to her to get her harsh attention, because as far as I can remember, I never interacted with her except when it was absolutely necessary.
Okay it's high school. EVERY one goes through that, you say.
How about in your 3rd year degree in University? By someone who was once your close friend? This time it wasn't me, who was the victim, rather, a close friend of mine. She took control of her life by first getting rid of people who she thought were negative influence on her. I am SO proud of her for her honest and brave move.
Not proud of the stupidity that followed. Backhanded comments, bitchy looks, the works. No, it wasn't her doing this. It was the friend she pulled away from.
There are bullies everywhere. Your neighbors, teachers, colleagues, friends, family members.
"How does this connect with the first topic?" you ask. Men in general are bullies. I think it's the excess testosterone they pump out, which automatically makes them masters of the universe. And in a culture struck country like India, men view women as objects. They must have us under their thumb. Yes, that gives them the right to eve tease and grope us in public as well. Deny this, they will get aggressive and take what they want. No, I'm not trying to shove down some feminine crap down your throats. I'll leave that to my bra-burning sisters.
I wish I could go all Road Rash on them rather than get bullied off the road.
Hey man, I get the fact that you all are sexually depraved and shit. We all need some lovin' from time to time and yeah we get a little touchy-feely. But ew, yeah?
So the question is: Do you complain about the bullying or do you give the bully something to complain about?
